For Christmas, Cait got us a gift card to Texas de Brazile. For those of you that have never been there, or anywhere like it, you really should go. It's not like any restaurant I've ever been to. Once a year is enough, due to both the food and the cost. They have the most incredible "salad bar". It has heart of palm, artichoke hearts, cheeses from all over the world, roasted peppers, fresh asparagus, olives, goat cheese, mozzarella balls and the list goes on. You first serve yourself at this bar and then when you return to your table, you have a little disc that you flip. Green is for "bring on the meat", red is for "hold up on the meat, I'm about to explode". They have eight different meats each night; lamb, garlic sirloin, parmensan crusted chicken, filet mignon, Brazilian sirloin, etc. These gauchos go around with the meats on a skewer and cut it for you at your table. They serve garlic potatoes at the table and marinated bananas to cleanse your palet (spelled?). Oh, and they also have lobster bisque on the salad bar. When I made the reservation, I requested to be seated downstairs, due to Saxon's knees and upcoming knee replacement. Upon arrival, we were told that there was seating available upstairs and they do have an elevator. Sounded good. Last time we went, there was a salad bar both upstairs and down. This time, only downstairs....
We were seated and sent the boys ahead to peruse the salad bar. When they returned, we took the stairs down to the salad bar. All was going well, I selected my wonderful assortment of goodies and was on my way to the stairs when I remembered the lobster bisque. I made the comment that I was not looking forward to going back up three flights of stairs with food in each hand. Little did I know.... I got my bisque and proceeded up the first flight. About the second step, I felt the back of my pants begin to slip (I somehow have managed to lose 30 pounds and apparently the jeans didn't shrink). Get a mental image here. By the fourth or fifth step, I felt them down around "see level". There I am, a bowl of bisque in one hand, a plate of food in the other and my pants precariously slipping down. I'm thinking that if I don't do something quickly, they will be around my ankles. This is bad enough, but I can also feel that my underwear are slipping with them. What to do, what to do! I stop on the landing, keeping my legs together, hoping that will keep my britches up. I cannot go any further if I want to maintain any semblance of modesty. I cannot bend over to set either plate or bowl down, the pants would surely hit bottom. The stair railing is wrapped in festive garland. I turn and look for my friend that was supposed to be behind me. She is nowhere to be seen. There is a man seated on the lower level, eyeing me. I'm hoping that he's not fixin' to see more than he ever wanted to. I manage to get my bowl of bisque settled into the garland, pulling my pants up all the way around, with one hand. Ok, I can do this. Up the second flight I go. Oh no, there go the pants again. I feel that they are becoming looser with each step. Again I make it to the landing, again my pants are at "see level". This goes on for all three flights. By the time I get to the top, I am about mortified and my underwear have pretty much fallen as far off as they possibly can. So, the picture that you see above is the "before" picture. I totally forgot to take pictures at dinner and I damn sure wasn't going to take any "after" pictures. And the man seated at the bottom of the stairs, probably scarred for life....
This is the latest new knee. Now that Sax has two new knees, he is going to be the bionic man. At least not the SIX MILLION dollar man, just the $150,000.00 dollar man. Recovery is going well, just not as well as the left knee in January. We've only had one naked episode this time and when I asked him where he was going, he said "out to mow the yard". Now I'm sure the neighbors would've enjoyed seeing Sax mow in nothing but compression stockings, but it's really not a pretty picture. Too bad he can't get it wet for 8 weeks. We can begin enjoying the pool and he can bring us drinks, lotion, floaties. He'll make an excellent pool boy.
